My experience of writing first children’s book has been like the Tea Party with demons. We are on the same side now.
I can’t say about those who always wanted to write and are successful writers of their times. But, I have observed many late bloomers who haven’t had writing as their primary purpose or business; the dream developed inside them gradually.
I am one of those for who “once upon a time” formed itself.
So, I had an insight that refused to leave me. It kept me awake at night until I made an emotional contract with myself to share it with the world. Slowly, It ripened to the dream of writing a book for children. I fancied my name on the children’s book, which will become classic in the field of emotions and feelings. The fantasy stayed for many years.
Call it a magic moment, an epiphany, or the 3:00 AM consciousness!
The idea that made me dream is now a published children’s book, and it has given different meanings to my last ten months. I have hosted many demon parties during the process, and every demon has helped me discover precious pieces.
Blinded by insight
It started with, “I don’t know how to write, but my message is unique.”
I spoke to friends who had published the book, understood the process, took how-to lessons, and created the main idea’s mind map.
Although an online course for writing the children’s book claimed that I could write the book in 30–40 min and publish it online immediately, I had the manuscript with 500 words ready in a month. I obtained satisfying clarity that it would be 48 pages, 20 double, four singles, one page for the author bio, one for dedication, one for copyright, etcetera.
With the risk to embarrass me, let me share the part of the initial draft. Utter gibberish.
If you can taste these words in your mouth, you are not alone! Welcome to the most interesting first phase for naive writers. I have a memorable name to it — the affinity to insight.
It is both ecstasy and spell. On one side, the ecstasy leads the naive towards the road less travelled, and on another side, the spell makes the writer stiff and blinded.
After chirping in the clouds for many days, I stopped to render what I wrote. Welcome to the demons’ party 🙃
You don’t know anything about writing.
What is unique in your story?
Why will children read your book?
Wanted to return to my shell
I wanted to hide. But my believers, with who I had shared my dream, didn’t allow me to stop. This is the power of forcing functions. Even if you want to quit, forcing functions wouldn’t let you quit.
I spoke to everyone I thought would listen to my perspective without any judgements and I possibly will get the spark back.
After listening to all, I choose to get in my bubble with the people who encourage, who stretch out, who are creators themselves.
It is the longest and hardest but necessary period for any writer. There’s a lot to figure out. Some days, you wake up with certainty in your mind. Other days, you wonder about the meanings. You discover flaw after flaw.
Every moment is a fight with inner demons, who say — You can’t do this. You’re not ready. It’s too hard. Ok, another writing course.
You grab a cup of tea and invite them to the party. Offer them their favorite cookies, and listen to them. Don’t run and hide from the demons. They know your blocks more than yourself.
Don’t run and hide from the demons. They know your blocks more than yourself.
This phase taught me the value of staying true to the purpose and sticking around the basics. It holds a special space in my dream of becoming a writer.
When I felt like giving up, I called my mantra: When you are tired of the demons’ fight, take the next right.
When you are tired of the demons’ fight, take the next right.
After breaking the bread with the demon “what will others say” — which I thought was last to leave the party — I shared the illustrated copy with the people I admire.
To my surprise, their well-intended questions, like, “what does this word mean to 4 years old?”, “What feeling you want to leave a child with?” acted as an invitation for another party of demons, like:
I am not worthy of being a writer.
I don’t know my reader enough.
This writing is so demographically constrained.
The vessel carrying the message
The mindset shift from writer to carrier opened the realm of possibilities for me.
Every interaction, every edit, every illustration made the story sharper, messager deeper, and advanced me to the place where there is no writer but only the message.
The message of my first children’s book Nooh Finds His Lost Whisker evolved from the cloudy thoughts to — There is a dreamer in most of us. The dreamer who dreams to store all the answers of the universe in his noodly head. And Nooh (character) presents an answer to the questions that his noodly head couldn’t.
To all the aspiring authors:
If a message has visited you, knocked at your mind’s door, and refuse to leave, then get out of your way, and allow the story to emerge.
- Create the emotional contract with self
- Know that you will get involved with fights with inner demons
- Permit yourself to be in the bubble
- Have faith, stand guard to the message
- Stick to basics
Getting to the point where the story lits the same love for the story in the reader’s heart as it lits in your heart is the “Sport”.
If I can, you definitely can!